How To Find Your Father

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How to find your Father. My name is David Oates, I am the Head Researcher at Relative Connections, you can view my LinkedIn by clicking here. I am also the director of the adoption support agency which is regulated by Ofsted.

This week’s blog post is written after I interviewed a client of ours after we successfully located the father she had never met. The words are her own. I’ve added my thoughts in bold so you can see her side of the story and also our side and how the two compare. Anyone who is thinking of using Relative Connections to locate their father needs to know how important we will treat their search, we don’t just provide a list of names we trace your exact person.

Anyway I digress, over to Andrea Wood…

woman found father“My husband lost his father to cancer in 2011, this made me realise that life is too short and I didn’t even know if my dad was still alive. I felt that I had missed out long enough and also that my two sons would also enjoy having another Grandad” Dave Says – It’s pretty common for people to have a moment in their life when they decide once and for all that they are ready to find their long lost relative.

Who Am I?

“I’d never met my father so I constantly wondered if I was anything like him. My mum re-married and went on to have three sons with my step-father. I love my brothers very much but always felt very different. I wanted to know who I was, where I was from as I am very different to my mum too. I thought, if I met my father it might fill in these blanks” Dave Says – Again it pretty common to want to know more about who you are and where you come from.

Where to Begin…

“I knew where my father’s parents lived, I used to visit them every couple of months. Once they passed away I had no way of knowing where my dad was, my mum never wanted to speak to me about him either so I did not know which way to turn. Just after my husband lost his dad, we were discussing things and my Dad came up in the conversation, John (my husband) said that ‘you will never find your father, you’ve been saying you will for years’. I think I needed this push, as the next day while waiting for my boys to finish school, I searched for trace companies who could help. Relative Connections came up in the search and when I saw the amount of people they’d already reunited I knew that I had to use them” Dave Says – Not knowing where to start is common, there are other trace companies out there or you could try and find the relative yourself but the truth is, we’re the leading people tracing company in the UK for a reason!

Back to you Andrea…

“It was a very straight forward form to fill out, took me about 20 minutes to fill the information that I knew. I didn’t have any doubts at this point, I had already prepared myself for the possibility that he may not be alive or even not want to know me. The process was unbelievably quick, I filled the form in on Friday, I had the details on the following Wednesday!!

I took a week and put a letter together, then I posted it and waited for what seemed a lifetime.

I picked the time that my dad was on holiday for two weeks so I did not get a response for just over two weeks, my initial thoughts were that he didn’t want to know me. When I finally received a letter it was great news, he wanted to meet.” Dave Says – The work that goes into each case does vary but we tend to put two researchers on a case where we think we can make an immediate breakthrough. With some cases we have to order old documents such as birth records and this can slow the process down. We aim to conclude all cases within 28 days.

How To Find Your Father…

“It was nerve wracking when I first spoke to him for the first time, I was shaking when on the phone and then I cried when the call was over, so many happy emotions! We have since been on two holidays, one of them Florida and we’ve been having the time of our lives, making up for lost time. My sons get so excited when Grandad is coming to stay, best thing I have ever done!! I can’t thank you enough, you have changed my life for the better. I hope you continue to do the great work that you have done so far and I would be happy to help promote your business if I can.

I’ve seen some people mentioning the money that Relative Connections charge to find someone and say they can’t afford it but to me, getting to know my Dad has been priceless. I can honestly say that Relative Connections changed my life and in my opinion it was worth a few hundred pounds to do that”

Dave Says – We just wanted to say a big thank you to Andrea for allowing us to put her story on our website. It’s amazing making a difference to people lives and we don’t take that for granted.

We truly believe that everyone has a right to know more about where they come from and who they are. Our mission is to help you get back in touch with your long lost relative as quickly and cost effectively as possible.

If we’ve helped you and you’d like to tell the world your story then we’d love to hear from you.

If you’re ready to go ahead with your own search then don’t wait another day, call us now on 0113 282 5900.

This is our second story, this was our feature blog a few weeks ago.

How To Find Your Father. One Mans Story. Hi its Dave here, head researcher at Relative Connections – The People Tracing Experts, thanks for reading my blog this week. I’ve had another busy week helping many people find the person missing from their lives. I also had a lovely surprise yesterday from a customer we helped last year to find her father. We had a hamper of food, full of fruit and baked goodies, delivered for all the guys in the office, which was great because they all work really hard to solve each case, it’s not just me! The customer in question took things very slowly with her dad and they have developed a great relationship with each other as well as getting to know a sister she never knew of!

This week’s blog post is a great story…

Late last year Antony Speight contacted us as he wanted to find his father, whom he had not had contact with for over 50 years. Antony was determined to find his dad and after trying on his own he contacted us to help. I spoke with him this week to discuss his search and here’s what he had to say. My questions are shown in bold, Antony’s answers are underneath.

Antony finding father

Why did you decide to find your father after so long?
My mum passed away a few years ago and just before she died, she gave me some information she knew about him. Until then I had never tried to find him as I didn’t know anything about him. Having searched since my mother died without success, last year I made the decision I really needed some help as I really wanted to find him. It had been 52 years since he left my mother and I had many questions I wanted answers to. Like why did he leave my mother to raise me alone? I really wanted to know what had happened and I wanted his version of events back then.

What made you come to Relative Connections for help?
We had done a lot of searching. I had tried websites like ancestry, various libraries and I had even visited Bournemouth, where he was last known to be. I spent endless hours searching, and felt I had exhausted all avenues. I decided to contact a local paper in Bournemouth to see if they could help and I also contacted Relative Connections. We found you on the internet and decided to hire you after we had hit a brick wall. I gave you all the information I had and left it with you.

“We had no doubt whatsoever once we had hired you having spoken with you before going ahead and reading other peoples testimonials”

How did the search go from your point of view?
The process was a simple one, although we gave you very little to go on and it was really quick. You found his birth record quickly and ordered a copy of it to get his full date of birth. At the same time the paper ran our story and we waited for news. A week later you contacted us saying you had found my dad living in the Bournemouth area, where he was last known to be. I don’t know how you did it because I had tried this myself. Unbelievably the evening before you called us we had also received contact from someone who had responded to the newspaper. He knew my father and he gave us the same address, so we knew you were right! The information you provided filled in a lot of blanks and told us about his marriages and where he had been living in the last few years etc. How did you feel when we called you and told him we had found him?

When you rang us and gave us the news we were ecstatic to say the least. It’s hard to describe really. When you have been searching for so long you sometimes think it’s just never going to happen. What did you do next? We put a short letter together along with a photo of me and my three boys and posted it to the address we had. We didn’t have to wait for long, he called me the day after! We spoke for a couple of hours and have spoken over the phone every week since. He has also sent us photos of himself and his partner. I haven’t rushed things as my dad is 75 now and we have still to meet up. We have however planned it in the next few weeks and he has arranged for us to stay in a hotel down there. We are both looking forward with excitement to meeting, it will be a big day in our lives.

“I can’t thank you guys enough for you what you have done for me. It really has changed my life and I will always be grateful”

I would like to thank Antony for taking the time to share his experience and I hope you enjoyed hearing his story. If anyone else would like to share their story please get in touch, I’d love to hear from you.

If you’re ready to start your own search then call us on 0113 282 5900 and we’ll arrange a free consultation. Once you’ve had your consultation we’ll provide the exact price for the work and then you can decide if you are ready to go ahead, it’s that simple and if you’re serious about finding your person like Antony was then don’t wait another day, we’d love to hear from you. We can help you to answer the question “How To Find Your Father”